Mrs.DoleIsOutofControl! - (EPUB全文下载)

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My Weird School Daze #1
Mrs. Dole Is Out of Control!
Dan Gutman
Pictures by
Jim Paillot
To Emma
Contents
1 The New PTA President
2 Ryan’s Mom Is Weird
3 The Good Old Days
4 Everybody Loves Bonbons
5 Getting Ready for the Big Day
6 The Greatest Day of My Life
7 Why Is There a Square on My Head?
8 Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah
9 Mrs. Dole Goes Overboard
10 Throwing Up
11 Passing Out and Making Out
12 The Perfect Baby Name
About the Authors
Credits
Copyright
About the Publisher
 
 
 
1
The New PTA President
My name is A.J. and I hate school.
But you know what? Soon I won’t have to go to school anymore for a long time. You know why? Because today is the first day of June!
Yay! June is the best month of the year because it’s when summer starts! Yippee! No school until September!
Me and the guys were putting our backpacks into our cubbies. It was Michael who started singing the best song in the history of the world.
“No more pencils!” sang Michael, who never ties his shoes.
“No more books!” sang Ryan, who will eat anything, even stuff that isn’t food.
“No more teachers’!” sang Neil, who we call Neil the nude kid even though he wears clothes.
“Dirty looks!” I sang.
That’s when Andrea came in. She is an annoying girl with curly brown hair who loves school. Andrea had on her mean face.
“Hey Andrea!” I said. “What’s with the mean face? Are you mad because school is almost over?”
“No, Arlo,” said Andrea, who calls me by my real name because she knows I don’t like it. “That’s not why I’m mad. Did you hear about the PTA election last night?”*
“No.”
“My mother was running for president,” Andrea said, “but she came in second. So she has to be vice president again.”
“Big deal,” I told Andrea. “If the president gets assassinated, then your mom will become president.”
“Nobody assassinates PTA presidents, Arlo!” Andrea said, rolling her eyes.
“They do too!” I told her.
“Do not!”
“Do too!”
We went back and forth like that for a while. Sheesh, what a grouch! So what if her mom isn’t PTA president? Andrea should take a chill pill.
I went to my seat, which is next to Ryan’s.
“Where’s Mrs. Daisy?” Ryan asked.
I looked around. Our teacher, Mrs. Daisy, was nowhere to be found. She usually gets to class early.
Mrs. Daisy used to be called Miss Daisy, but then she got married. Ladies become Mrs. when they get married. Nobody knows why.
Since Mrs. Daisy wasn’t around, I crumpled up a piece of paper and threw it at Andrea. It bounced off her head.
“Arlo!” Andrea shouted. “Why did you do tha ............

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