Mrs.CooneyIsLoony! - (EPUB全文下载)

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My Weird School #7
Mrs. Cooney Is Loony!
Dan Gutman
Pictures by
Jim Paillot
To Emma
Contents
1   I Was a Genius!
2   Mrs. Cooney Is Loony!
3   My Big Decision
4   The Last Straw
5   Checking for Headlights
6   Ryan and Michael Go to the Nurse
7   The Truth About Mrs. Cooney
8   Spying on a Spy
9   Vowel Movements and the Third Degree
10   I Thought She Was Gonna Die
11   The Stakeout
12   Good-bye to Mrs. Cooney
About the Author and the Illustrator
Credits
Copyright
About the Publisher
1
I Was a Genius!
My name is A.J. and I hate school.
The worst part about second grade is math. I don’t get it. If we have calculators, why do we need to learn math? That’s like walking to school when you could ride your bike. It makes no sense, if you ask me.
“Who can tell me what two times ten equals?” asked my teacher, Miss Daisy.
A few kids raised their hands. I didn’t. Miss Daisy called on this crybaby girl Emily, who has red hair.
“Miss Daisy, I don’t feel very well,” Emily said. “Can I go to the nurse’s office?”
“Rest your head on your desk for a few minutes, Emily,” said Miss Daisy. “If you don’t feel better, you can go see Mrs. Cooney.”
Emily put her head on her desk.
“Now who can tell me what two times ten equals?” Miss Daisy asked again. “A.J.?”
I had no idea what two times ten equalled. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know what to do. I had to think fast.
I knew that two plus two is four. And I knew that two times two is also four. So I knew that addition and multiplication were pretty much the same thing.
I also knew that two plus ten equals twelve. So two times ten must equal twelve too.
“Twelve?” I guessed.
“Sorry, A.J.,” said Miss Daisy.
“Oooh, I know!” said Andrea Young, this really annoying girl with curly brown hair. She was waving her hand back and forth like it was on fire. “Call on me, Miss Daisy. Please?”
Andrea thinks she knows everything. I wish I could punch her.
But nah-nah-nah boo-boo on her, because Andrea didn’t get the chance to answer. At that very moment, the most amazing thing in the history of the world happened.
Emily got up from her seat really fast. She ran to the window.
And then she threw up!
It was cool. Me and my friends Michael and Ryan looked at each other and tried not to laugh. I was glad that I wasn’t walking under that window when Emily threw up.
After she finished puking her guts out, Emily ran out of the room crying.
“Go to Mrs. Cooney’s office, Emily!” Miss Daisy yelled to her. Then Miss Daisy went to the intercom and to ............

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